Stuck between Zone 4 and Zone 2

25 11 2009

Last night I went to Micheal McIntyre’s Wembley gig. It was hilarious. I laughed from start to finish and thought that my evening of comedy ended after his encore. Little did I know. I got on the tube, and started to take off my coat. I got just past my neck and realised the zip was stuck. So I start to tug, and tug, and tug. It was properly stuck. The friends I was with, being the supportive, helpful bunch they were started laughing, drawing the attention of fellow travellers to my plight.

Mild panic, slight claustrophobia, a sharp increase in body temperature and unavoidable humiliation set in. Obviously this did not help. Nor did the fact that I started to laugh…and having had quite an emotional week, the laughing turned to crying. I was on the brink of what my closest friends know as “the laughing/crying thing” (to be avoided at all costs). Seeing my acute stress – Rach, one of my oldest and dearest friends, just sat back an laughed, and nudged her mum out of her seat to help me. So now I am stuck in my coat, overheating, laughing, crying and now I have my friends mum, and my friend Gemma trying to free me from the zip. How embarrassing! All the while I can see more and more people trying not to look – but desperate to watch this most ridiculous of events from their front row seats.

You would think it would end there. Oh no. Rachel’s Mum had to give up, so Gemma took over. Her tactic was to be slow and gentle, speaking to me calmly (a red, mascara streaked giggling mess) and ever so gently tugging at the fabric wedged in the zipper – well that was after she tried the tugging with all her might tactic and punched me in the face. I promise you I am not making this up.

Fortunately just as we entered Zone 2 I was liberated. I believe there was even a cheer and a round of applause. I think everyone on the carriage certainly felt like they got their money’s worth of live comedy for one evening.

And I am off to buy a new coat. With buttons.

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3 responses

25 11 2009
Gem

I am still laughing! So sorry for the almost-black-eye! Who needs up stand-up comedy when you have friends like us! x

25 11 2009
Rachel's Mum

Am still laughing!
Am happy to be a gig buddy any time in the future.
Happy coat hunting!
xxxxx

25 11 2009
Rachel

Ha ha ha … I am named and shamed. Sorry for laughing Barton … I was just so excited to witness the ‘laughing/crying’ phenomena again I couldn’t help myself. I am glad you are free from your coat prison … I had visions of you remaining in it for days and eventually being surgically removed from it ;) xxxxxx

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