Kirsty Barton's Blog

On a break

kirstybarton — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 08:00:25 +0000

After nearly two years of blogging about my mundane, yet strangely eventful life, I have decided to pack away my pencil for a little while and refuel. I’m sure I will be back at some point when the frustration of a life without illustration becomes all too much for me to bear. Until then, there’s plenty in the archive to keep you amused during your coffee breaks.

In the words of Arnie, “I’ll [probably] be back.

Thanks for all the support

K x

Knock Knock

kirstybarton — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 07:00:56 +0000

At times* my alarm clock feels like this.

* 5 minute intervals for up to 45 mins, 5 days a week.

3 monkeys

kirstybarton — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 07:55:44 +0000

See no evil (or the planet of the apes movie)

Hear no evil (I assure you the best part of the film is the lead man)

Speak no evil (that includes speaking apes)

I anticipated fear. I got comedy, and I’m not sure that’s what the director intended.

Expresso

kirstybarton — Wed, 17 Aug 2011 07:00:06 +0000

My housemate has started selling skin care products. I was having a good nosey through all the make up, and she said I was welcome to try any. I nearly cracked open the foundation and applied liberally. If I had I would have looked something like this.

Expresso is not my shade. Seems my housemate’s supplier gave her a few (hundred) shades too dark.

Eat me

kirstybarton — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 07:00:24 +0000

My mate got engaged recently. He told me that in his celebrations with a friend he may have clocked up a substantial bar bill. It seems that drinking bottle(s) of champers makes one invincible, and eating the bill, yes you read that right, EATING THE BILL, destroys the evidence. Hilarious. (He still had to pay the full price, and he assured me it was nothing to do with the manager calling the police.)

“YOURS”

kirstybarton — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 07:42:14 +0000

I’m not particularly co-ordinated at the best of times, but I am obstinately stubborn and ever-so-slightly-competitive. So when challenged to a game of ping-pong in the pub, I reluctantly obliged (I didn’t want to show the boys up – you know how men get with sport). Anyway It wasn’t long before my team-mate realised there were only two lessons to learn whilst playing doubles with me.

1. I don’t move (ever).

2. If the long arms can’t/can’t be bothered to reach it, it’s up to the partner to get it. To make it easy I just use the “YOURS” command.

Simple yet effective. My partner got the gist and took to standing behind me. Our combined skill ensured our victory.

V-I-C…V-I-C…V-I-C-T-O-R-Y…

#riotcleanup

kirstybarton — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 07:45:05 +0000

This week in London has been pretty devastating. It’s been surreal, scary and sad, but what I love is the true British spirit. Hoodies are no match for a community committed to make a difference, like the mob armed with brooms that descended on Clapham Junction and promptly tidied up the mess.

From G-ripping to D-ripping

kirstybarton — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 08:52:42 +0000

I’m relieved I have not made the move from paperback to the kindle. I won’t be making the move until they have made a waterproof one. My crime novel is now doused in lavender and tea tree bubble bath – gripping.

Pucker up

kirstybarton — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 07:37:10 +0000

To combat my sore lips I have resorted to applying a thick white cream. Useful yet unattractive. I look like a 90′s pale pearl lipstick wearer, or possibly even a girl with no lips. I’m not sure which is worse.

A Jar

kirstybarton — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 12:40:53 +0000

I bought myself a lovely big mason jar at the weekend for my kitchen. It’s so big I can fit all my cereal in it. I like a lot of cereal (1.5kg to be exact). I emptied the whole lot in, screwed the lid on and eagerly waited for breakfast. Disaster. The lid is VERY hard to get off. This is an unwanted barrier between me and my breakfast. After a lot of muscle power, and my seriously contemplating buying and old lady style jar opener, the lid loosened. It was only then that I realised it is too big for me to pour into my bowl…so now my country style kitchen mason jar sits next to the soup ladle so I can access my breakfast. I bet they don’t tell you that in the ideal home magazines.