Knitting Needles?

My housemate gave me acupuncture last night. I had to take a bath, lie down and relax. Easy. Then she whipped out the implements of torture. As she stood over me needles in hand, she said, don’t worry I don’t really have any big needles, and laughed. I believed her. She stuck a few in and left me to relax. It was all ok until I thought, I wonder just how big these needles in my hands are, so I looked up …error. Seems like physio’s and fitness instructors come from the same school of mis-truth. The fitness instructor says only 5 more. You end up doing 50 more. Small needles/Knitting needles obviously seem the same to a physio!

She did the trick though and it worked. Well my coffee didn’t come squirting out my hands or my head this morning so it’s all good!

Bring on the hotties!

It’s that time. I have dug out the trusty hot water bottle. Bliss. You can’t beat a hot water bottle for comfort and warmth. I was just thinking on my walk to the gym how nice it would be to be encased in a lifesize hot water bottle. I mean think how warm and snug you would be. By night it would be like a warm water bed, by day you would just be lovely and warm (if not slightly impractical). Only drawback I can see would be if cold commuters insisted on invading your personal space for a bit of warmth.

Well it would count toward my 12-a-day I guess…who knows you may even snag a real hottie!

New Year, New You

isn’t that the saying? Well it is a new year, but I am still as calamatous as I was last year. Last night proved it. I walked into the shop – picked up a basket. Headed directly toward the innocent shop assistant stocking the shelves. I was fully aware of him. I got side tracked – turned round rapidly to speak to my mate Rach – and in the process – my basket knocked all, yes all, of the cardboard boxes folded up and piled up on his trolley. They all landed on top of him. All I could see was a pair of eyes under a mound of cardboard. I am ashamed to say my first instinct was not to bend down and help him, but laugh. Poor man. I did help him when I had stopped giggling – but I noticed other shoppers fighting back chuckles having witnessed my mal-manoeuvre.

2010 is off to  good start!

Those 3 words

“I love GPS”. That’s what my friend Con exclaimed on our epic mountain biking session in the snow earlier today. That’s when I knew we were in trouble. This is the man whose GPS is always on “scenic” (he and his wife managed a 7hr – S E V E N – hour gps mix up on their last trip to France) . It seems you don’t have to be in a car to get horribly lost. And lost we were. We even asked a fellow mountain biker directions. Seems like his GPS was on scenic too – he mistakenly told us the wrong way – and was very, very, very apologetic to us when we finally reached our destination and got the much-anticipated cup of tea and freshly baked cheese straw.

All it took was that 1 cuppa and much coveted cheese straw and the frostbitten toes, bashed buttocks and two hours of cycling in circles were forgotten. It was a great day out despite our detours – and all I have now are fond memories and a massive blue bump on my shin and matching bruise on my hip!

New Year’s Resolution

My new years resolution is to give up what has become a New Year’s tradition. I would like to state for the record that I do not make a habit of kissing strangers in bars. I have however been known to slip up (consistently) on one particular night of the year. NYE. I am such a rebel. This year was unfortunately no exception, and was once again caught on camera.

A 1 min kiss at midnight doesnt really count does it?  At least he was tall, dark and quite handsome, and did look a bit like Poncharello from chips (my secret heart-throb from the 70’s)…except he probably was not even born when I was watching CHIPs. Oops…

Scan-dalous!

I have been on holiday for a few days now – and already my sketchbook is overflowing with amusing events. Seems my adventures are not just confined to the snowy shores of the UK. I went to upload a few…and there is no scanner :/ so I will have to stockpile them until next year. Which leaves me no choice but to focus my attention not on my blog – but on my belly. So I am off for lunch, and coffee and dinner! Have a Merry Christmas and see you back in 2010! x

It’s snowing!!

and for once I have appropriate footwear! Amen!

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>>> If the snow globe’s not shaking, just click and open it in a new window! <<<<

I have a head for heights

and it’s a good thing too, because with the ridiculous shoes I have earmarked for NYE, I am going to end up in 2010 about 2 feet ahead of everyone else.

Chewbarton

The most embarrassing thing just happened. I called up a colleague in marketing to check I understood some amends she had emailed me. So I ring up and start to speak. Well I tried to. All that happened was this strange gurgling, guttural, groan (just like this). THIS IS NOT NORMAL, nor has it ever happened before. I tried to clear my throat apologising profusely – well trying too – but all she got was more of the same…until eventually I swigged some water and blurted out a huge apology. She must have thought I moonlight as a chewbacca impersonator.

Worse thing about the whole thing, is that I know she has caller ID, so I couldn’t have even hung up and pretended it wasnt me.

Christmas Turkey

I am not a huge fan of turkey at christmas time. I am however a massive fan of a christmas hat in the style of a huge turkey. That is why when I was rummaging through the box of “hats” in the party shop in Clapham on Saturday, I just could not resist. My mission was to get some festive head-gear for a party that afternoon – all of us had to provide a secret santa in the form of a hat. Priceless. What was even better was the fact that when santa distributed the gifts, my carefully wrapped offering (2 plastic bags from the party shop) ended up with the guy sitting opposite me. I burst out laughing. He looked like he wanted to burst out the door and not look back. But in true christmas spirit and with the daring of a helicopter pilot – he donned the turkey – and didn’t take it off all night. 10/10 for effort!

I got an illuminated elf hat, not bad, but after 1 or 2 or maybe even 3 merlots, I made it my personal goal to commandeer a very sparkly, very shiny sequined beret that a guy across the room was wearing. I was not to be dissuaded by his stubborn reluctance to part with his secret santa gift. I tried using the bobby hat – complete with flashing light, and pretending I was an officer. No. I tried sending over a 6′4″ lad in a fur trim cowboy hat to negotiate 5 mins with the hat. No. I tried begging. No. This human disco ball was not having any of it. Not to be deterred I even considered jumping across the tables, executing a matrix style flip (in slo-mo) off the back wall and snatching the hat. Merlot makes you invincible.

No. Perseverance and a bit of help from my partner in crime paid off. When the disco ball was busy at the bar – we ran up behind him, snatched the beret – and very maturely ran straight into the ladies loo – where we stood with the door open taunting him. Filled with Christmas cheer, it was very, very funny. In fact the whole evening was funny from start to finish. I finally feel like Christmas is here! Ho Ho Ho!

Anne thanks for organising such a great afternoon!